Archive for the ‘Introduction To Tabby-ism’ Category

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Captive

January 1, 2009

I found this sample of my high school writing among some of my old belongings. Thought that I would share it (This is one of two I found written on the same piece of notebook paper. Cute, huh?). 🙂

 

How you hold me tightly….
Helpless beneath your grasp.
Sometimes I feel you’re seeing-
The face behind the mask.

You hold me though unknowing.
I sigh beneath your grip.
I long to kiss the softness-
Of every grasping tip.

The waves of time keep sending
The message to my brain.
I feel the every movement-
Of what I can’t obtain.

With every waking moment
Of being close and near,
I shed the signs of happiness,
With every falling tear.

– Tabitha Castillo

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Written In The Stars

January 1, 2009

Found this recently in my old high school belongings. Thought that I would share 🙂

 

100 billion of them up there
All shining in the sky,
But all I have is one wish
You know exactly why.

You’ve watched me. Seen me closely-
Even though you are so far.
You saw me when I met him-
Oh, shining wishing star.

You’ve seen beneath my mask now
And though he doesn’t know
You see the scars are written-
On what I never show.

You’ve seen the many reasons
That I choose to hide
You’ve seen me outside wishing
You’ve seen my inside pride.

I wish that when it’s night-time,
He’ll see and then he’ll know.
He’ll see what I have written-
On starry moonlight glow.

– Tabitha Castillo

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Swallowing Glass and Decorative Ribbons

September 8, 2008

 

When you left me broken and confused
I swallowed glass.
Your words now travel through my body
Slicing away at me with every sentence.
Even now as I lay here wanting to cry
For the simple reason of not knowing why
Splinters trace the gaps behind my eye balls
Forbidding me to.
Now with every message I get
I am faced with the realization
It’s not you.
You blew the glass yourself
With the last words you uttered.
Repeating them
To hear them
Resound in my ear
Will only call them to the surface
And I will be the long ribbon
That once decorated
The Heart I gave you….

Tabitha Castillo

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He Can Only Hold Her

September 8, 2008

Loneliness brushes the swell of her lips
But he can only hold her
Reaching for something gone and amiss
Absence himself adores her
His words alone can stroke her heart
A cradle for the broken fray
They whisper secrets to her soul
And get her through the day.
Trailing to what they cannot avoid
The bridges he burnt before her
Seeking a path not leading astray
But he can only hold her.
She needs to see that he can stand
Before the tides that lap him
Believe that what he before once did
He’ll never again let happen.
Embracing the confides of her skin
His kisses numb her shoulder
He’ll try his best to pretend to change,
But He can only hold Her.
As If caressing touch can rub away
The lack of Love with Solace
And pacifier the weaning needs
That gape with seamless callous
He’ll shadow what he thinks needs
To project and show and be
A fading heart he finds still bleeds,
But He can only hold Me.

– Tabitha Castillo

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Gentleman Of My Dreams

September 8, 2008

I dream sometimes of this man that I seem to always know in my dreams. The odd thing is that when I look back at my dreams I can remember nearly every detail about the dream except his face. In the dreams we always seem to pick up where my Life seems to be. Odder still, is that I have no knowledge of who the gentlemen is that keeps starring in my dreams or even if he is a real person, but I find myself looking forward to seeing him again.

You visit me in silence,
When we are both asleep.
We’re captives to our pillows
And then in dreams we meet.
With words that are really whispers,
In beaches that are really pretend,
In a place where fact and fiction
Are ours to command and bend.
Subconciously you reach for me
And naturally I stand.
Our connection is to beautiful
For the awake to understand.
All your daily troubles
Are forgotten in my arms
And I a willing captive
To your kisses magical charms.
I feel asleep in daylight
And wait for darkened sky.
At night I’m stolen away
Into the arms of my dream guy….

Tabitha Castillo

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From The Confines Of My Sleepy Mind

September 8, 2008

The sky will cry the saddest tears
Is there no way to repent
And hide all my inequities?
They are mine here
And a part of me.
In this forsaken state of self.
God save me from my mind
It keeps me thinking all the time
That I am here and I’m alone.
Both surrounded by people
And surrounded by me
I am all that I pretend to be.
It is you my Love and light
That I have yet the chance to sight.
So for tonight sleep tight and hold my hand
In darkness
That true Love may find us in
The sweet dreams of promises
I make myself.
For night is my Mistress
And you are my Lord
In this bitter sweet union
The two of us have yet to meet.
I give you Life through my words
Meaning through my sighs.
The grey of doubt should never brush my eyes.
For I believe that though I am alone
Here
In my island by the Sea
Solemnity
Has never been my forte.
Only lies can save me from myself
In this state of dead night
For I will cry till it is day
And another dream can hold me.

Tabitha Castillo

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Eyes Of Green Marble

September 8, 2008

Stone cold angel
Guiding light me with the presence of your face
Embrace
Me when I am too far to hold dear
Allow me to know that I am not alone
Even when doing things that you do not condone
Heart
Give it to me without hesitation or doubt
Remind me what being happy is all about.
Show my tears where to go
And know
That even in anger I do not forsake you.
Be with me when I cannot stand to be with myself
And remind me that Life as I knew it ended the day you walked into me.
Eyes of green marble you light my way tonight.
Even though that each day with death we fight
The stars will cry the saddest tears the day we give up
On us before we let it begin.
Oh rain on me and wash away the stress that mixed emotions within.
You’ll open your arms I’ll open my eyes
To realize that this won’t go away
As the sun shines a new day
Will not shine on the end of this tie that we share.
The things I wear will not make you “heart” me more.
Adore
Me
And show me that.

Tabitha Castillo